Omega to Alpha

I was casually scrolling through Facebook today and there was this ongoing theme: the First and the Last, the Alpha and the Omega. As high school seniors, people were posting, Last First Day of School photos. Aside from feeling somewhat blue because my respective parent didn't pester me for a pic, I couldn't help but reflect on how much I've grown and how much I've changed from my itty bitty freshman years. And this whole day has been more or less: surreal.

I remember I walked on campus with both my parents to see me off in the wee hours of the morning, but now I come back, with a car nonetheless, and I walk into the halls alone, but more assured of myself than the little 15 year old who turned back to wave good bye.

Changes? Well, for one thing: just knowing.  I know more people, I know more places, and I know my way around the school. Needless to say, I was confident, now my only hope is that I can carry that with me after high school. If there's anything I've learned about being an introvert in high school, you can't wait for experience to give that confidence boost.

Each year, I've gotten more comfortable in my skin at school, which is a given with time and experience, but I've noticed that I'm like a snake lurking in the undergrowth, checking my surroundings, before I slither out of the shadows. I wait until I'm comfortable enough before I really venture out.

People say that timing is everything, and I would have to agree, because I realized that I could have done more stuff, if I had just hit the ground running instead of just waiting. That can be my problem sometimes: waaaaaaiiiiittttiiiiinnnnnggggggg,

Prime Example of moi.
(I do not own this picture)

If there's something I've improved on, it's being more proactive. Call it an introvert's occupational hazard but ideas and daydreams swarm about in my head like bees, but I've never actually produced the honey (please excuse the excessive use of simile, I quite like them).  As the years have gone by, I've worked on branching out without so much deliberation. Deliberation is just a rational word for indecision which is something that I have a lot. Thus, there really isn't much that I can say that won't sound cliche. Yes, I've grown, and yes, I've experienced so many new things by just "putting myself out there", but the thing is making a habit of it.

So while I begin the last of my first day of school, my goal is to not only do better in school, but to make sure that I don't rely on experience to boost my confidence. I want any confidence that I gain, to stem from myself. I don't want to wait until circumstances fit to my terms, I want to fit the terms of whatever circumstance I encounter. Most importantly, I want to take a word out of my teacher's book: self-pride. I want to gain confidence in my capabilities even if I find myself among the "best and the brightest" as he put it.

The point is: it's ok to be the freshman, it's normal because it's about the experience; however, don't wait to be a senior to gain a presence. All the Alpha's had to start somewhere. Confidence is best manifested from yourself and yourself only. Ha! Look at me, sounding like a wizened man with a long beard and white hair. Even though I may not be Gandalf or Dumbledore, hopefully my two cents will help you, enlighten you, or just entertain you. So,
from an

Introvert's Guide: Have a Happy First Day of School!

I do not own this picture 

Getting Back to School/ Sherlock

Hello beautiful people,

Introverts tend to stay away from any social interactions that they can.  One of the worst social events of the year for me is the first day of school.  If you are starting a new school, you wonder if you will make friends, and for returning members you wonder if your friends have changed or made new friends or will even like you anymore.  Summer has always been a time for me to get away from people.  I don't text if I can help it.  I don't go on Facebook. I don't make plans with friends.  I need those three months alone for me to be able to spend it with people the other nine. 

So while I always have this nervous feeling that my friends have moved on in the past weeks, I still push myself out of bed and get to school looking decent.  Making friends has always been a struggle for me.  Don't get me wrong, almost everyone at my school considers me a friend, I'm a crazy, outgoing person that is easy to talk to, but many times I don't consider others friends.  And now I have a little story about that:

Alyssa and I have known each other since first grade.  Let me rephrase that, Alyssa and I had a class together in first grade.  I left that school half way through the year and have no memory of her, but she still remembers me.  The first time I remember meeting her was freshman year of high school.  She was the nerdy Asian girl to whom I could talk.  She was nice, and I didn't feel judged when talking to her, so we swapped numbers and had a whole year of being friends/ me having classes with her.

She soon became other Alyssa to me, because me had Alyssa P. We had one inside joke and nothing else to our friendship.  (I can't see you) I really didn't consider her that close but always as a backup option if nothing better came along.

Sophomore year was slightly different.  We still weren't close.  We went to homecoming together with another girl, but once I got there I hung out with other people.  We had a blog together, but other than that I wasn't to attached to her.  Over the summer she asked if we could carpool junior year.  Really what she wanted was a ride home, and I felt put out by this request.  But I said yes, mainly because I had no other reason to say no. 

Our first ride home was awkward.  We had both quit the blog a long time ago, and even though we had known each other for a long time, I felt no connection to her.  To this day, I still feel terrible for the time I accidently left her at school.  I was just in a hurry, and Alyssa, I am so sorry. 

But doesn't every good friendship need its trials? Hermione wasn't part of our heroic threesome till halfway through the first book. 

Somehow we both became friends.  Maybe it was the long and personal talks on the way home.  Maybe it was the constant texting to work our schedules together.  Maybe it was destiny. Either way, soon those dreaded car rides home were the one part of the day I looked forward too.  It was a twenty minute escape between school and homework that we could both just be ourselves.  We made tons of inside jokes and found so many things we had in common.

We both watched Sherlock.  We noticed that I was very much like Sherlock and she was like my Watson.  We would laugh over it and joke about those things.  I would lead her around and she would follow me.  I would poke, nudge, and prank her and she was always there for me.  She was one of my true and closest friends. I even found myself texting her about 50 things in a row (talking to her even though she wasn't there)

We both took psychology this year.  One of our assignments was to take the Myers-Brigg personality test that we offered to you guys in the first post we put one here.  When we got our results we could not believe it.  I was INTJ, the rarest of all types for women, and she was ISFP, the most common type for women.  We were talking about how accurate these were for us, and in the middle of learning about them we came across famous people with the same type as us.  I had Sherlock and she had Watson.

We could not believe how accurate our casting had been.  We were both so happy, we changed the contact names in our phones to our new aliases.  But that was not the end to the Sherlock similarities. 

We found many pictures online that described our friendship perfectly.  My all time favorite is this one, because I always mess with Alyssa and she always falls for it.  I can perfectly see this happening.

It works so perfectly for after all of the times I prank her and she swears it will be the last and it never is.

But there are other perfect ones too.

For all the times I goof off and she just stares at me.

 

And it doesn't just have to be Sherlock, as long as it is Sherlock Holmes related.

:) Love you too Alyssa

 

But we have our nice moments too

 

Overall she's my other half and I am so thankful for all of the many memories we have been able to make together.  This could be a friendship that lasts forever.

 

So to end the story and tie it all together, whenever I am presented with a situation where I have to meet new people and don't want to interact with, I think of all the friends I have made because I interacted with people.  Without going to school I would never have made this crazy, awesome friendship.  Every time I have to be with others or get nervous about meeting people, I rub this scar I have on my hand.  While Alyssa did not give it to me, another friend I have who I didn't like at first did.  Whenever I see the scar I think of how I have changed because of my friendships and how one person can make such a difference in life.

Love,  

Amanda/Sherlock

 

P.S. Alyssa- This is the first time you are hearing most of this.  Remember I didn't know you then, but I known you know and love you.  Enjoy these pictures of our friendship and remember, unlike Harry, the game is a foot!

Introvert Meets Gym

Photo Courtesy of Pinterest, I do not own this photo

Cue the gasps! For I entered one of an introvert's worst nightmares: a gym. Gyms and I have had a distant, incompatible past circa kindergarten. It began with the ever-dreaded physical education and I was one of the few students who did not look forward to 45 minutes of physical exercise (unless it was free time of course). I am not entirely opposed to doing physical things, the fact of the matter is: I am not good at doing physical things. Not to mention, my chill disposition does not support the aggressive lifestyle that is team sports and physical activities. So you can imagine my reluctance at joining a gym.

I went to my local YMCA with co-author/friend Amanda, as she is an expert at exercising in the sense that she is far more knowledgeable about performing workouts and maneuvering exercise machines than I. And it doesn't hurt that she's had a good 11 or so years of team sports under her belt. Me? Does...dancing in my room count?

On this day in particular, we went to the gym on a Monday afternoon and it was as if fate decided to be funny, for the gym was chock full of attractive, psychically fit, teenage boys wearing the typical jersey shorts and sleeveless tees. Familiar with these situations, I kept my eyes trained on anything else but these boys. But I thank God, that the YMCA architects had enough sense to keep the weight room separate from the treadmills.

After some light jogging on the treadmill, of course fate wasn't done with me yet. I bumped into a classmate of mine. Luckily, she is such a sweet person and I had no qualms against her, but it goes to show that "bumping into people" is a charming and somewhat hazardous characteristic of small town life.

Overall, it wasn't bad all things considering. I had went to two other gyms before this and I can definitely concur with the three bears when they say third time's the charm. As an introvert that doesn't seek out any form of physical fitness (aside from pinning workouts from Pinterest), I relished in the opportunity to improve my health and I could definitely feel my mood perk up afterwards. So those healthy food commercials are right to some degree: when you make healthy decisions there is some kind of domino effect because I would actually eat fruits afterwards. (Also surprising if you are aware of my eating habits). That said, a gym or some sort of physical activity is worthwhile if you know how to go about it. So, here's some things to consider when tackling the monster that is a gym.

Choose Your Gym Wisely

Photo Courtesy of Pinterest, I do not own this photo

One does not simply walk into a gym. It's like Mordor that way but less dramatic I suppose. And less mystical but that should only make it less intimidating. The key is finding a gym that fits for you so you don't have to be surrounded by buff dudes pulling weights. It's all about what suits you and making it work for you.

Headphones are Your best Friends

Headphones are an introvert's best friend because there is an unspoken rule that if the headphones are on, the mouth is off. No talking is required. Music helps create a mini bubble that helps you ignore your surroundings. I find this helps if you're self conscious about working out.

Actual People Don't Hurt Either 

While introverts avoid social situations, it helps to have some back up. Take a friend! It makes you more motivated and pumped and slightly less awkward. So when you can't figure out how to turn on your treadmill you have a helping hand to ease you into the routine of working out.

Should you find yourself dubious of all things gym-related let this anecdote serve as inspiration. At the gym, Amanda and I saw a little boy around 7 or 8 years. He was dressed in slacks and a polo, reading the Odyssey whilst walking around the perimeter of the pool while all the other kids were swimming in the pool. Seeing him, gave my heartstrings a little tug, because I was him as a kid. So if he can make it to the gym, then I sure as hell can too!

Eventually, once you settle into a routine, going to the gym isn't as bad as it sounds but even I know that's easier said than done. So my best advice is just keep trying because you'll find something that works for you and God knows that we introverts need some exercise. Just think: if Frodo can go to Mordor and battle evil forces then going to the gym won't be half as bad.

Lots of Love,
Alyssa

Fighting the Truth

Hello my pretties,

I feel the sudden urge to clarify something.  I am an introvert.  There are going to be many times that it won't seem that way.  I am what scientists call a moderate introvert, meaning I'm on the border.  People often mistake me as an extrovert because I make friends with as many people as I can.  I talk to almost anyone and feel comfortable about it. It was not always like this for me.

It started after middle school. Those three years had been like hell on wheels for me, much like it is for most kids.  When I started high school, I didn't want to be that awkward kid again.  So I changed. I told myself that that awkward tension wasn't there; that people will talk if you start the conversation.  I became a friend to everyone.  I have forced myself to go and talk with other people, and I am so glad I did.  Before I was always worried about what people thought about me and how I was acting, but as soon as I stopped caring I was free to be who I truly am. 

Now many of you fellow introverts are terrified by the idea of talking to others first.  You probably think I'm crazy for making friends with people in other groups.  Let me be honest; It can be terrible.  People are not always nice.  They don't have the same beliefs as me and it can be hard to make myself do it day after day.  I still don't go to parties because of how much social anxiety I get, and I don't leave the house that often because of how tired being around people makes me.  That's why I'm an introvert.  I just have decided that living in fear and regret is something I don't want to do, so I have stopped it.

Alyssa and I are very different people.  She is happy with her introvert side.  I am extremely happy too.  But as this blog goes on, many of you will relate more to her because she is proud and staying an introvert.  You can think of me as a introvert intervention.  I will be posting about my time as I try to go against what every bone in my body is telling me.  If you are an introvert and are tired of being stuck in your shell than you might relate more to me.  Either way, we will both be posting some great stories, events, and just tons of stuff for you all to read about and hopefully interact with.

Here is a little picture to help bring a smile to an introvert's face.

I know this  is more serious than I normally am, but I needed to explain this before I started with all of the other posts.  May the odds be ever in your favor, whatever your favor may be.

As Always,
Amanda

Breaking the Shell

Well hello again! I thought it would be apropos to  take some time to reflect on what being an introvert means to me because I understand that it's different for everyone and it also helps to understand the writer's perspective.

Since I was a child, I was always shy and quiet. Hiding behind my mom wasn't uncommon. Keeping a couple feet behind the group was how I kept my pace. Starting a sentence and finishing it off with a murmur wasn't a condition, it was just me. I was that one kid at the party who read a book in the corner and I was totally fine with it. Why would I want to be at a party when I could be fighting the White Witch in Narnia?

I think I take pride in being an introvert because that's a part of who I am, but like everything else; balance is key. As a perpetual daydreamer, I always imagined myself doing these great, ambitious roles: a star player, an artsy photographer, or an adept baker. I wanted to be like the people I read in books and watched in movies, but something was blocking that: me. I desired to be all these things, but I was too shy and self-conscious to do anything. I think that's why I'm a daydreamer: it's because I can be anything I want and I won't have anything stopping me.

Oh, but how that's deluded me. I realized at a young age that if I wanted to be like those people I dreamed about I had to stop being introverted. I had to break the shell of my own making. As the days go on, I try my best to do something, anything that puts me out "there". It's an everyday struggle because it's so natural for me to be introverted.Sometimes tapping into my extrovert side means tapping into my awkward side, because when I try to make friends and interact I don't have the same effect as my other friends do. They can make friends in the snap of a finger.

However; I can say from experience that when you do take that step, it's rewarding. For all the times that I've done something new and out of my comfort zone, I have learned something new, I added something to my "experience box", and I've met new people. It's almost as good as fighting those beasts in Narnia (almost).

But most likely if you're reading this, then you are an introvert too. So, I just want to say, there's nothing wrong with being an introvert. The world needs introverts believe it or not. We're the invisible observers and it's through the silent, subtle actions that we do that impacts the world. Can you imagine if all the loud, extroverts ruled the world? We'd need Beats headphones to block out all the noise and chaos! I digress.

The point is: I love being an introvert because that's how I learn. It's also how I take in my world. I don't always have to be an extrovert because how then, can I be that sympathetic sponge that absorbs my friends troubles? How can I really be me? I notice that if I take too much trouble to be social, I forget to take time for myself so I can explore my own hobbies. So don't reject your introvert side, rather embrace it with open arms! Just don't let it completely take over you to the point that it inhibits you from self-growth. Also, it makes even that more special when I decide to be more extroverted.

So every day I try to reach my full potential but I won't lie to you and say that it's easy. It's not. Part of being introverted stems from lack of self-esteem but I want this blog to be a way for all of us to reach our full potential, too, whilst embracing all aspects of ourselves! That's the thing: I don't think you can be one or the other. I think we have both sides; we just need to find that balance.

Lots of Love,
Alyssa

A Quick Note About Me: Part 2

Hello all of my beautiful people,

I come to you today to say a little bit about myself.  I am the second half of this awesome team that is going to be spreading all of our knowledge about introverism.  I would have normally fought with Alyssa to let me go first, but I was out of town last week, so I hoped you enjoyed getting to know her without me around.  But now that I'm back, here is a quick summary about me.

Above all else I am an artist. Portraiter for life.  I like to paint and draw.  Maybe one day I can share some stuff with you, but that's not what this blog is about so maybe not.  I love to read.  I love to watch movies and TV shows.  I analyze everything.  Literally, everything! I am a fangirl, the main ones being Sherlock, Harry Potter, Star Trek, The Hunger Games, X-men, Marvel comics, and weird things such as The Office, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, Les Mis, Wicked, Psych, Once Upon a Time, and Mumford & Sons.  I don't watch supernatural or doctor who because I believe it would be like I was cheating on Sherlock.  I make up my own words when I cant find one that fits. Take this post for example; I made up two words in it. (50 points to Slytherin if you find them.) School is my life, at least for the next year.  I ride horses and love it. 

As you can see I am a crazy busy person.  I mean, whomever made Sherlock episodes that long did not think about my schedule! In all seriousness I like this blog, and I promise to stay with it as long as possible.  I just hope you can make me the same promise.

As always,
Amanda

A Quick Note About Me

Salutations! I am trying my best to write this post so that it doesn't sound pretentious yet I'm trying to avoid my tendency of self-deprecation as well. But, I will keep it sweet and simple, because I know that I'm good at beating around the bush. Ahem...

Hi! I'm a Alyssa and I'm an introvert. That goes without saying, but I should specify what kind of introvert I am. I am the kind of introvert that is a member of many fandoms ranging from SuperWhoLock to Anime to K-Pop to British TV. (I have yet to embark on the various Comic fandoms). The only Vampires I like are the ones that sing about Oxford Commas and drinking Horchatas . Confession: I also hoard various items (specifically books and magazines) and I am a perpetual daydreamer. Writing is a not-so-secret passion of mine and I am the eternal homebody that is trying to make my way in this world.

That said, those are just a couple of factoids about me but assuredly you'll learn more about me in the future. For now, thanks for reading or scrolling or both. I hope that this blog can be an enjoyable place for introverts, extroverts, or just curious people to peruse and to understand that the quiet ones do have a lot to say.

                                           Lots of Love,
                                                  Alyssa